Moving Forward. Going Deep.

My best running happens early in the morning when my mind is fresh and my body is rested. But one late afternoon run I started at 3 pm, with eight long interval miles ahead of me. Training for my second half marathon in less than a year pushed me, while also giving me a new and growing confidence in the strength of my body and my mind.

My last two miles that Sunday were the hardest. My feet were sore, my legs tired. I made a new personal record for my 10K running time and even got some nice sprinting times in. Exhaling a long breath of joy as I saw my Garmin watch hit the 8.00-mile marker, I slowed my run to a stop and took note of my stats. I felt better than good, despite being sweaty and having legs that felt like jelly.


SURPRISES ON THE PATH

I was so focused on reading my finishing time and pace and run splits that I didn’t even see the very attractive thirty-something Black man in front of me. Until he spoke.

Him: “Hey…I saw you getting it in for a while here, you’ve been putting in work.”

Me: “Thank you. Yes, just finished eight miles.”

Him: “Wow!!! You really have been putting in work.”

Me, smiling with pride: “I’m training for a half marathon.”

Him: “Well keep it up.” He then smiled and kept looking my way as he walked past. Then he stopped and turned back towards me. “Hey, my name is Marcus. What’s your name?”

Me: “My name is Melody.”

After our brief introductions, we headed in our different directions, but I could tell he wanted to say more. He left me to my cool down walk and continued on his way. Our short conversation encouraged me as a single woman who has been praying about dating opportunities. It also reminded me of the peace and joy I experience when I have focused time on the pavement, whether training for half marathons or simply walking with intention as I pray and process my life with the Lord.


INVITING GOD’S PRESENCE IN OUR DAILY RHYTHMS

Making space for these times provides regular rhythms to be present with myself and invite God into the nuances of my life. He’s already there, but taking the time to actually talk with Him about my dreams, my needs, and what’s making me smile lately helps me build intimacy into our relationship. Moving my body through walking and running helps me move my words and thoughts out of my head and into my heart and mouth. My voice finds cadence for my feelings and longings with the rhythm of my feet hitting the asphalt under me, one step at a time. There’s a rootedness I feel, something Colossians 2:6-7 describes so well:

Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, rooted and built up in him and established in the faith.” (ESV)

Life with Christ isn’t designed to be lived standing on sidewalks or sitting down on benches casually watching others take a lap around the park.

Life with Christ compels me to move towards Him, in whatever method of movement I can, and live in Him, receiving the supernatural anchoring and spiritual moxie that faith in Him produces in a willing heart like mine.

I find in my journey, Christ beckons me into life with Him, and that life necessitates movement with Him daily – whether that’s walking with Him, sometimes running, maybe a light jog, and in some moments of unimaginable loss and grief, the surrender to let Him carry me in His arms when my knees buckle and I can go no further in my own volition.

Each time I head outside my home for another walk or run, not only am I choosing to exercise my physical self, I’m giving life to my spiritual self too. Being aware of my whole self is very important to me. And with each mile laid down during my pavement times, I find that more of me gets rooted deeper into the story God is writing for my life. I join Him in the journey of my runs that keep me moving and the walks that give me the introspection my soul needs. He is Emmanuel – God with us, the God who walks alongside us, and the God who roots us deeply to Himself.

Featured in 2021 on Propel Sophia, a platform that’s part of the Propel Women collective.

I Leaned In

What if the journeys that we need to find are the ones that bring us back to ourselves in the most possible realest way?

These words rose up in my mind today and gracefully laid themselves down on my shoulders. Words to consider and to enjoy. I’ve been on quite a few journeys over the past two years. Some brought me great joy and some ushered me into pain that I hadn’t ever experienced before in my life.

Through the joy and the pain, I chose to GROW.

I leaned in and I lived intentionally. Through the brilliant and soulfully rich moments and through the tear-stained ones that I knew by faith would not always last.

I leaned in and those journeys were ones that have uniquely brought me back to myself in the most possible realest way.

Photo by JD Mason on Unsplash.

Sometimes I find that my body and my soul have a reckoning with each other. It’s like they both sit down and say to each other, “We have LIVED A LOT and this living stretched us and we’re older and different, but we’re also so much better because of it.”

That’s how I feel right now — that the living I’ve done, the places I’ve traveled, the people I’ve loved and some I needed to let go of — all of it brought me back to myself. Changed me. Caused me to reflect on who I am and the woman I want to become in the next two years and what will I do now to set that woman up well?

As I think about this question I also think about my story, the one God is writing for me and that I’m co-writing with Him.

I love a good story. Being a storyteller and writer, I come by it easy. Some of my favorite movies are favorites because of the story. Whether I’m taking a stroll with Holly Golightly down 5th Avenue as dawn breaks in Breakfast At Tiffany’s or accompanying Drew Baylor on his artful soundtrack laced road trip across America following his father’s death in Elizabethtown, story catches my heart and it holds onto me.

Stories are journeys that we all are a part of. They teach us lessons about ourselves and other people that sometimes we need to learn and sometimes we’re blessed to stumble into and uncover the gems hidden in the experiences.

In the movie Elizabethtown, the character Claire is one such gem. She consistently speaks truth to Drew that’s just right for the moment and I also feel is just right for those of us peeking into this story that dances with grief, sits with the questions that billow after an epic professional failure, and hits the nostalgia, stress, and belonging that come as a packaged deal with returning to your family roots.

Here are three of my favorite truths Claire tells Drew:

Sadness is easier because its surrender. I say make time to dance alone with one hand waving free.

We are intrepid. We carry on.

To have never taken a solitary road trip across country? I mean everybody’s got to take a road trip, at least once in their lives. Just you and some music.

Take some time this weekend and watch Elizabethtown yourself. Maybe you’ll come away with some gems from this story that help you see your own journey through a much clearer light.

MLK Reflections

Note: I wrote these words January 21, 2019, for a special event at my job January 24, 2019, that honored the life of Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. During the event, I spoke these words to 450+ colleagues, sharing ways that I see our organization reflect Dr. King’s dream for change today. 

As I walked down a short flight of steps in The National Center for Civil and Human Rights, the lights around me shifted from a crisp fluorescent to a subtle, light glow. It looked like I’d accidentally entered the back end of an exhibit.

Music and voices bellowed softly in the room, full of blown up images from Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s life – and his final days.

I stood for a moment.

Martin Luther King Jr.

I wanted to take in what I was hearing and also seeing as I watched others process this experience.

It felt like a very sacred space. These were moments in time that stayed constant in their motion to honor a very special individual.

A man who gave much for the cause of Freedom, Oneness, and Diversity.

Dr. King was 39 years old when he left this earth. His life and legacy speak of the intention that he moved from. Considering his age and all that he accomplished through those 39 years makes me consider my own life.

I’m 39 years old and the more I live, the more I understand how critical it is to live with INTENTION.

Dr. King lived his life this way. Even when it was uncomfortable. Even when it challenged him deeply. And especially when it meant fighting for necessary change over lukewarm complacency.

You see, our choices make us who we are.

And we need those choices coupled with our intention because inward decisions lead to outward actions that have the power to change the world.

Dr. King changed the world because of his decisions and we’re here today to honor his incredible life and legacy.

MVIMG_20190124_105333.jpgAs I reflect on Cru and how this ministry continues to grow as a community passionate about connecting people to Jesus Christ, I see the power of intention at work in several places. One specific one is through The Lenses Institute.

Lenses is an initiative of Cru that exists to help the people of God fight for Oneness by influencing the way Christian leaders see, understand, and act in our ethnically and culturally diverse world. 

We hold several institutes around the nation in cities that include Los Angeles, Orlando, New York City, Phoenix, Lexington, Atlanta, and Raleigh.

As a facilitator and cultural consultant with Lenses, I’m honored to witness many in our ministry be changed by this experience.

Thousands have stepped into this five-day intensive that helps people understand cultural awareness and cultural identity. This happens as they examine their own individual journeys and also enter into the experiences of others from different ethnicities.

Awareness and identity in the area of culture powerfully shape who we are as believers in the Church and beyond the church’s four walls.

In those five days through Lenses, I get to witness people in our ministry willingly step into deep waters that include uncomfortable places and even difficult emotions, as conversations around race, power, and the gospel emerge.

These are people like you. People like me. People who lean into this opportunity to grow personally as they discover more of God’s heart for His kingdom.

People who begin to see God’s hand at work in the weaving together of their stories and the gift of their ethnicities to display the gospel brightly in this world.

People who are willing to enter conversations that help them understand the experiences, pains, and joys of their brothers and their sisters.

These conversations develop empathy, which gives birth to compassion that deepens emotional intelligence and relational trust – two gems that can help the road toward Oneness be paved just a little bit more smoothly.

In John 17 verses 17 through 21, Jesus prayed for Oneness for His disciples and for those who would later come to faith as a result of the gospel being spread. He prayed for us:

Sanctify them in the truth; your word is truth. As you sent me into the world, so I have sent them into the world.

And for their sake I consecrate myself, that they also may be sanctified in truth.

I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me.”

In Oneness as the Body of Christ, we can demonstrate to the world that God the Father sent His only Son.

The unity of the Household of Faith displayed through men and women, from different ethnicities, cultures, generations, economic backgrounds and more has the power to change this world by showing the world such Oneness – in itself – is from God.

And He loves the world so much that He sent Jesus to the world to save it.

Dr. King understood the power of Oneness. It pushed him forward to walk with God in faith and invest his life with intention so that the lives of others would be changed.

Through The Lenses Institute, I see how our ministry reflects Dr. King’s dream for a better world.

A world where people could be respected as the image bearers God created them to be. A world full of promise and brimming with possibilities.

Last night, I read Dr. King’s “Letter from Birmingham Jail” and this quote by him grabbed a hold of me and wouldn’t let go:

Let us all hope that the dark clouds of racial prejudice will soon pass away and the deep fog of misunderstanding will be lifted from our fear-drenched communities, and in some not too distant tomorrow the radiant stars of love and brotherhood will shine over our great nation with all their scintillating beauty.” – Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Road To Celebration: Half Marathon Hilarity & Lessons Learned

The Celebration Half Marathon in Celebration, Florida was on my mind back in 2016. I determined to be ready for the January 2017 race but in July I sprained a ligament in my left knee after a kickboxing workout.

Ligament sprains are challenging injuries because they take so LONG to heal. And I ended up re-injuring my sprain again in October. Celebration Half 2017 was not gonna happen for me.

But the desire to run my first half marathon never faded away. It just continued to move with me as I moved into more of my life. Running January 2018 could have worked…if 2017 hadn’t been so crazy full. I had no time to train as my life pulled me in many directions, from resurfaced health challenges to a fuller professional life and personal life.

The mental and emotional space I needed to prepare just didn’t exist.

Getting Ready
Lenora, one of my Black Girls Run! sisters and me September 22, 2018. My six-week fitness challenge began on September 17.

But fall 2018 yielded what I needed, starting with a six-week fitness challenge at my kickboxing gym. That process propelled me into losing nearly 15 pounds, 1.3 percent body fat and pushed me closer towards my first weight loss goal of 25 pounds.

A core belief of mine is that the less I weigh, the better running will be on my body, especially my knees and feet. Letting go of fat that I don’t need so that I could run faster became a motivator to get rid of it.

At the close of the fitness challenge October 29 I knew that if I wanted to be 2019 Celebration Half ready, I’d need to start training that week, using a 13-week plan from Track Shack.

I entered the journey and decided to start with walking and move to interval miles, where I’d run for 30 seconds and speed walk for 30 seconds.

I put in the miles each week, along with the cross training of kickboxing and rest days, and slowly my 5 feet 10-inch frame began to build greater endurance for what would become the biggest fitness adventure of my life.

January 1, 2019, BGR New Years Day Run. Weight loss and toning show my progress.

Months after the six-week challenged ended, I continued the nutrition plan of focusing my diet around macronutrient meals to continue my weight loss. I eat lean protein, veggies, and healthy carbs for breakfast and lunch, protein shakes for snacks, and lean protein, veggies, and healthy fat for dinner.

I heard a fitness expert say, “You can’t out train a bad diet.”

Those words are so true. Exercise will get you some places. But nutrition will keep you there.

Two weeks before the 2019 Celebration Half, I did my longest set of interval training miles – 22 miles total for the week – with 12 miles done on a Saturday run. That run changed my life because it showed me how far I’d come in my journey.

I averaged a 13-minute mile almost half of those miles. I’d never done that before. From the end of mile three to the end of mile seven, I ran faster not even feeling it, moving from a 14:21 average pace per mile down to a 13:55 average pace per mile. I kept looking at my pace like, “what IS happening here!”

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January 12, 2019, my longest training run.

My body was telling me it was ready for Celebration. Race day finally arrived on Sunday, January 27, 2019, at 7 am. And with it, much hilarity ensued and some great lessons learned:

Half Marathon Hilarity

  • I accidentally washed my wireless earbuds in the washing machine days before the race. The buds were in a zipper pocket in a running jacket from an earlier training run. I forgot I left them there. But I had a backup pair of wired earbuds that got me through the race.
  • The weather for this race felt like it came straight from the pits of hell! Straight up. It was about 54 degrees but felt more like something in the almost high 40s. Rain fell the entire time. Winds blew consistently. Of all the days for this kind of weather, did it have to come during my first half marathon?
  • I felt like I got initiated into legit running with this race. With what I had to endure because of the weather I’m grateful I persevered.
  • My conversations with God as I ran:  My attempt at begging: “Lord, could you just make the rain wait until this afternoon?” As the wind blew my poncho almost over my head: “Really God! C’mon!” As the rain hit my face horizontally: “This is NOT okay!”
  • I taped my running shoes with duct tape. It 50% worked for a few miles. One of my Orlando Black Girls Run! sisters encouraged me to duct tape my shoes before the race, to help keep the rain out. I also looked at some pictures from another runner’s blog about rain racing. I felt so proud of my taping skills. Until the top flap of tape plopped off my right sneaker after mile three. I should have followed the full instructions from my BGR sister and taped the whole way around my shoes. My bougie self wanted to be cute. Wet feet for 10+miles made me learn my lesson. IMG-20190127-WA0031-1
  • My conversations with myself. As I neared the starting line: “I’m actually one of those crazy running people now.  Who runs in the rain.” As rain and wind pummeled me: “I am crazy for doing this. I must be crazy. THIS is crazy!” As my quads, hamstrings, knees, and calves started tightening because of the cold: “Mel, you got this. Keep pushing through.”
  • The nine-minute bathroom break that felt like the rapture. After mile two, I saw a bathroom spot that wasn’t a porta potty and headed for it. Putting my RunKeeper app on pause, I waited in line and realized just how soaked by the rain I was. My poncho was not holding up well. After fighting with a tissue roll that wouldn’t start and trying to decide do I hold onto my rain-sogged gloves or put ’em in the trash, I finally exited only to discover the crowd of racers that had been running/walking outside before was all gone. Minus one lone walker. It felt like the rapture had happened. I knew I had to get moving fast! And by mile four, my intervals runs caught me up with more racers.
  • My introvert loved the quiet moments of racing. If there’s one thing I loved about Celebration 2019, it’s that fewer racers were on the road because of the nasty weather. Which meant more space to have distance between oneself and other people! Man, that was so good. This race was quieter, even peaceful at times like the miles over the boardwalks, through palm covered forests and little marshes.

Half Marathon Lessons Learned

  • Hand warmers in gloves are no match for rainy conditions. The warmers were great in the car. But soon sputtered out from their heat effectiveness as the rain soaked everything clinging to my body. IMG-20190127-WA0030-1
  • Duct tape 100% of your sneakers all the way around twice. The tape is strong, but the consistent drip-drip of rain will eventually affect its fortitude if you don’t tape your shoes well.
  • I should have clipped my toenails like I said I was gonna do the night before the race. I ended up not clipping because I was lazy. But the added length of nails that should have been clipped added to my soggy, slightly stressed feet during those miles. A tiny bit of something can agitate you the whole way.
  • Poncho RunningWhen racing while raining, wear the heavy $4.99 poncho instead of the 99 cents one. In my mind, I thought I would move faster with the 99 cents poncho. In reality, that cousin of the plastic trash bag slowed me down more. I got soaked and spent more time fighting with it.
  • Or just wear a light-weight, hooded, waterproof rain jacket. A jacket like this would have kept more of me dry yesterday. Some runners can run in the rain, but running drier is a motivator for me.
  • Stretch more in cooler weather. I moved my legs around a bit at the starting line and did some good stretching the night before the race. But I didn’t factor in how the cold, wet weather would make my muscles clench up. And man, did they clench up by mile four. I had trained in cold and even windy weather, but not cold, rainy, windy weather. It felt like my body was doing double-duty  – to keep me warm and face those miles all at the same time.
  • Make sure you have a waterproof runner’s belt. My belt for longer miles with two water bottles attached is amazing. But in the rain, it fell short. I assumed it was waterproof when I bought it. But during the race realized it was not. Luckily I packed a ziplock bag for my phone and that kept it dry.
  • Have a backup to capture your running stats. Runkeeper hit a crazy glitch as I entered mile 11. And dropped all my stats, except for the miles I’d put in and the calories burned. More on that below in the “L” Award section. If you really wanna track your movement, could be good to have two apps recording your splits, pace, and time.

Mel’s MVP Awards…If I Could Give Some Out

  • My legs and feet are the true champions. They endured over four months of training, physical endurance, and pain and showed up for me well during my race. I wish it wasn’t so cold and my body didn’t have to fight off the elements AND focus on energy and performance for those miles at the same time. But my body got me through because it was ready. Honorable mention goes to my core, arms and my lungs! I crossed the finish line at 3 hours 55 minutes but I’m deducting nine minutes for my bathroom break, so my finish time is more like 3 hours 46 minutes. I wanted to finish at 3 hours and 15 minutes, but I did well, in light of the weather.Goal Accomplished
  • My close friend and sistergirl Jessica. Jess decided to train with me back in fall 2018, to encourage me towards my goal of doing my first half marathon. She did many early morning runs/walks on cold days and some longer runs too. She also drove me to my race and drove me home. I couldn’t have done Celebration without her.
  • My night before race dinner and pre-race meal. My chicken burrito from Chipotle with the needed carbs of rice, two beans, that tortilla, and the protein, veggies, and fat set me up well for Sunday. I don’t get to eat burritos like I used to but when I can, I use the carbs well for exercise prep. My pre-race meal was half a ruby red grapefruit and a serving of raw almonds. The small meal kept my energy high just before my first GU gel.
  • GU gels are amazing. Energy gels don’t work for everyone. But I tested GU gels out in my training and they work amazing for me. Chocolate Outrage is my fav. It tastes just like chocolate fudge. I need four gels to power through 13.1 miles, taking a gel every 40 minutes after my workout begins. These gels kept my energy up and boosted me at the right times.
  • The cheering squad along the race route. The half and full marathons take place throughout neighborhoods in Celebration. Many residents cheer on racers from their front porches and yards. Some even set up little stands with water and energy snacks for extra encouragement. These people are just awesome. I found that in the moments I needed that extra push of encouragement, I’d turn a corner and see a smiling face, hear a “You got this, you’re doing so well” and it would keep me going.
  • The half and full marathon racers. There were several racers who saw me towards the end of the race, and as they ran past they encouraged me with “Good job…Fight for it…You’re doing great.” That blessed me. A lot.
  • The race volunteers. They were out there in that cold, wet, nasty weather right along with us. Cheering for us at water stops and encouraging us too. I am thankful for them.

And The “L” Award Goes To…

  • Runkeeper for failing me miserably at mile 11. I entered mile 11 with a good average pace of 15:57 and over three hours into the race, considering my feet were soaking wet, I was drenched and my legs were tight. Then my Runkeeper app lost its mind. It started saying I was averaging a three-minute mile, which was impossible AND that I was minutes into my activity, which also was wrong. Maybe the GPS reading hit a glitch? My splits and average pace were gone from the record. Disappeared completely. Two things the app did continue tracking were my miles and my calories burned.  Hours later, the splits came back in the app but not the average pace for the entire run.

I ran and finished my first half marathon. I did it! I’m beyond proud of me. It’s not just that my body had to commit to this process. My MIND had to. I believe if your mind commits to it, you can do ANYTHING.

So Proud

One of the sweet gems from the race yesterday that hit my heart with truth is seeing different pieces of clothing discarded by runners throughout the course. Runners often will lay gloves, shirts, and even jackets on the ground they no longer want, as their bodies heat up in the race. Holding onto things you don’t need can slow you down.

The practice of laying things down speaks powerfully to many things in life.

If you don’t need it, lay it down.

If it slows your progress, lay it down.

If it’s not functional for you to have it anymore, lay it down.

I’ve laid down a lot on my road to Celebration: A loss of 23 pounds. Four percent of my body fat. Unhealthy rhythms with food due to stress, life, and adulting.

As I ran to get to this goal, I picked up some of my own gems too: A stronger, leaner self. Fueling my body with wisdom. Saying ‘yes’ to healthy intentions.

Cheers to a memorable first half marathon experience. I survived!

And the momentum continues for my next one. I have my eyes on the Orlando OUC Half Marathon this December 2019, Lord willing and the creek don’t rise.

Finding Me Truth #9: Weakness is Exactly What You Need

​But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. – 2 Corinthians 12: 9,10

Truth. 

What if we considered limitations and disappointments our strongest moments? Failure and weakness remind us we’re not in control. We don’t have power. 

But God does. And he desires to put that power to work in us, especially in our most powerless moments. It’s in those moments that we can see how badly we really need him and choose to surrender to his plans and wrap ourselves in his fortitude.

Counter the culture, weakness is exactly what you need to experience the presence and nearness of God. Weakness beckons and invites him to meet you exactly where you are and be a present help in your time of neediness.

Embrace your weaknesses. Express your neediness. Ask God to enter into them with you. In them precious victories await because of God. Hope in him never disappoints.